Phoenix

The last BLOG entry I published (that loooong one about Sky's birth), starred Lizzie in a strong supporting role. Like many of you, Jess wrote me encouraging, loving, supportive words. She also commented on her lack of appearance on the blog. Well, little sister, I guess you had to move across the country to get your own piece.

Jess & Ben as Modern American Gothic
Jess and Ben (and Zelda and Galileo and Gizmo) have moved to Phoenix, Arizona. Last Friday night Jess arrived home from a 3 week intensive training at Sunbridge College in New York, needing to organize, pack, sort, clean and prepare to move 2500 miles away by Monday evening. Although Ben had already made a dent in the process, there was still an incredible amount of work to do. Jess & Ben needed to fit all their stuff into a 6x4 trailer and the back of Jess' Vibe (making sure to leave room for Zelda & two cats).













Re-enforcements were needed, and Chris, Lizzie, Erik, Sky & I answered the call. We packed and cleaned and threw out a ton of Jess' stuff and moved another ton to Chris' house and took breaks playing with a very happy, naked boy out on the sunny lawn.


And then we left Jess & Ben to finish up this momentous task, which of course they did. I spoke to Jess on Thursday (8/3), they were headed for New Mexico to spend the night. By this evening (Friday, 8/4) they should reach Phoenix.

Little sister, you will be missed. Sky and I have been spoiled in this last year, getting to see you for a weekend every month. Sky has been dealing with his feelings about your move in a few ways. As you know, on the drive out to North Adams last weekend, Sky started telling me about his imaginary "Friend Jess". "Not Auntie Jess," he explained, but "my friend Jess. She has blue hair and blue-green eyes and we play all different kinds of games. And we make bread from dough with seeds and nuts in it". Until yesterday, this friend lived far away, but now Sky's friend Jess lives with us and "sleeps in the bed with me and Jacob cat (Sky's stuffed cat-friend)." Phoenix is also a lot closer than I thought. Apparently phoenix is really our living room, where Sky keeps moving too. He packs his cart full of varied objects (including his stove) and "moves to Phoenix". "But Mama," he says, "you can come visit me!"

Sky playing Auntie Jess' Bass

I am sad that you're leaving. And at the same time I am so proud and awed and inspired by your courage. (Remember, courage is not the lack of fear, but the act of doing what you know is right, despite your fear!) You were the one always looking for security, for whom home and family and stuff and predictability were so important. Now I see you finding that security within yourself, not in the outward trappings of books and clothes. You know that you will create a home for yourself wherever you are. You know that you carry your family in your heart, as we carry you in our hearts.

When I started to write this blog, I was verrry tempted to write about the obvious metaphor in the act of starting over in Phoenix -- something about rising from the ashes...Instead I'd like to remind you, Jess, about something I gave you a long time ago (perhaps for your 12th Birthday?). A print of a fairy/angel jumping off the edge of a cliff. I believe the print was titled: A Leap of Faith, Hoping for Wings. You are taking that leap of faith. Leaping into the unknown, with faith in yourself & your ability to do this powerful work of teaching. Faith in Ben and your animals to be the family and support that you need. Faith in the Goddess who has set this path before you. Remember though, if those wings you are hoping for don't materialize, that we are always here to welcome you back, arms open, without judgment.

Jess and Ben, we will miss you. But you aren't any farther away than a phone call, a letter, a blog. You aren't really any farther away than a thought, and our thoughts and prayers are with you. I wish you success and joy. I wish you both ease in this intense transition. I celebrate this journey of transformation with you. Blessed Be.